Not the fancy first entry I was hoping for

Posted: August 1, 2010 in Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

So, this isn’t the big grand spectacular first entry I was planning. But, my mind is a’ racing and the words are spurring to scroll across the page.

I’m not one to throw stones, while living in a glass house. Nor am I one for publicly airing my dirty laundry- or streak stained undies of others. But, I’m pissed off.

What ticked me off? A simple face book comment. I’ve been defending and making excuses for this person for far too long. Supposedly, they are “too busy”.. too busy to even respond to a “hi-how-are-you?” text message. So when I seen a status update about partying all night… I’m sorry- THAT made me crazy. I never hounded nor hassled – I respect space especially since I ask for quite a lot from my friends. But, if I’m there for you, letting your tears soak my shoulder and then when I need a shoulder I can’t even get a text message? I figured my childhood friend would be there for me while going through things- like oh gee I don’t know my dad almost dying. So I went a little crazy this morning.

Coffee calmed me down. Until later while having a bbq with family. This is when I found out things about my brother that categorizes him as certified douche bag. He’s been refusing to step up and be a man. Refusing to take my father anywhere blatantly telling my dad he simply doesn’t want to take him out because he is too slow. Today, I found out my brother has been skimping money- money my parents don’t have. That is the real reason he doesn’t want to take my dad out and around and for errands. I mean my brother doesn’t do much errands as it is. They send me, driver licenses in my pocket, walking to the store to trug back bags and bags of an assortment of things. Smh. My big brother- you are a certified piece of shit.

Oh for the record, I cuss. Judge if you must, but however taboo you think it is just remember, I am a writer. Curses is part of the English language. Writers use everything at their disposable. Sometimes, a little vulgarity is just the little extra oomph needed to adequately express emotions. Either you like it, or don’t. This is just your warning for future posts.

Dropping More Than Tears

You left my shoulder
Dropping tears
for Grand Papi
– we were there-
like friends
ought to be.
No questions asked
without second thought
through 3 hours of mass
-in Spanish-
no language barriers
cause friendship
needs no translator.
Through your worst,
I was there
my friend.

My tears
stained my skin
-shirt soaked-
here, friend.

There’ll be no forgiving here
it takes actions
to forgive
and my dear
you haven’t acted.

Shoulder soaked
Cheek stained
I’ll wipe away
my tears
with the years
we used to be

  1. Crystal R. says:

    I can’t get over the “brother” part. That is so, so horrible. He’s more than a douche. >:o And then to add to that, your own friend isn’t available to turn to when you need her most.

    And I second that on the cussin’. 😉 Right now, I’d be cussin’ up a storm.


    • The brother stuff listed in this rant is just the tip of the ice burg. At this point, it’s not even upsetting on angering-just sad. Very, very sad. About the friend, it’s more so disappointing because I defended him for so very long. As did mutual friends. He has no idea of the things we do for him.

      Thanks for the comment. I hope to improve my conversational narrative writing. From this rant and raving free writing, to a rant and raving but from a literary perspective. Hopefully, with more of these posts they can evolve literary wise. I hope to retain the rant and raving but deliver it in a much more different way. I’ve become far to comfortable in writing, I’ve forgotten even the most basic grammar


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