It’s About Acting Like a Decent Human Being.

Posted: September 11, 2014 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

This goes against all girl code but I have to admit. I feel bad for Ray Rice.

Now now before everyone gets their panties in a knot let me explain.

Back in Feb when we first heard about this incident, all we saw and all we knew was him dragging her out of an elevator. We didn’t know the back story. We didn’t know what they were fighting over.  All we knew was they walked into the elevator and than he walked out dragging her.

Which that alone is horrid in itself.

But, I’m from New York. I see day in and day out girls acting tough because they hide behind that security blanket, they hide behind the fact society deems it incorrigible to put hands on a female in any and all cases.

But, i grew up with street views. Where I’m from, if you’re talking smack, man women or child, then be prepared to have smack talked back at you. Same goes with physical stuff. If you are putting hands on someone even if it’s not actually punches but pushing or mushing a guy’s face , be prepared to get hands put on you back.   If you can dish it out, then be prepared to have it served back to you. There is no medieval chivalry code   of conduct.

I’ve seen countless girls all in a guy’s face, screaming, hand movements, slapping and mushing and saying ” i wish you would put your hands on me!” and the guys usually stand there and take it.

But everyone has a breaking  point. There is only so much poking a lion will take before it bites your hand off.

I’m not saying it’s right  but it’s true. That’s the core problem. How are we raising our young or maturing ourselves into adults without growing up to be civil and peaceful? No one is teaching , no one is leading. We have a behavioral problem that goes deep into our very fibers.

We don’t know these people other than he is a famous NFL player. We don’t know how they act in the privacy of their mansion. For all we know day in and day out his wife is rowdy and confrontational.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t believe in violence. I’m not saying she was asking for it. I’m just saying we don’t know how these two people act when off of camera. They could both very well have a behavioral problem.

With all this domestic violence talk , it’s that segregation of man hitting woman which annoys me. It should be a person hitting a person. If you get in someones face regardless of your gender, then expect the person to get in your face right back.

Ray Rice did wrong. We all know that. He didn’t have to knock her out cold. He had many other options, even if he had reached a breaking point of provocation. He could have shoved her. He could have hit the wall. He cold of done a million other things.  His actions are his actions and that’s on him. Only him and his wife know to what extent and how deep this problem runs. That’s another thing though  about this whole situation. Everyone is calling him an abuser and her a victim but why has NO ONE reached out to Janay? Why has no one tried to intervene? So either the world believes this is a couple of suffering from domestic violence and doesn’t give a shit about the people/victim to actually do something tangible like HELP or it’s just fluff for ratings.

And this is the reason I feel bad for Ray Rice. Where was the media coverage of
1) Rae Carruth   a wide receiver for the Carolina Panthers in 2001. He conspired to have his pregnant girlfriend killed. The girl died, the baby survived with permanent and severe brain damage. He was found guilty and expected to be released in 2018.

2)Terrell Suggs linebacker for the Baltimore Ravens,  was arrested for punching his long time girlfriend in the neck, then dragging her along a speeding car  while two children where inside the car.  All that happened due to this was arrest was he was forced to give up his gun collection. He is playing tonight against the Pittsburgh Steelers.

3)Brandon Marshall , just google his rap sheet… though he was mentally ill and was diagnosed as bi-polar and is receiving proper care and medication and is now campaigning for mental health and domestic violence. He plays this Sunday against the 49ners.

4) Ray McDonald   defensive tackle for 49ers , was arrested for a domestic dispute with his wife. This happened recently after Ray Rice, after the new adopted penalties rulings for domestic violence charges. He’s still in custody but the NFL has not ruled on his standing. Under the new ruling he should be suspended 6 games.

Everyone was saying Ray Rice is a strong football player, he should never have attempted to hit a woman knowing his strength. Which is true . What about Professional fighters? These two were trained lethal weapons. Their job is to knock people out. Where was the media coverage and outrage over these two?

5) War Machine aka Jon Koppenhaver former UFC contender was arrested for brutally assaulting his girlfriend who was  left with 18 broken bones, hair sawed off , broken teeth , broken nose and bruises all over.

6) Thiago Silva  former UFC fighter who was arrested for two accounts of attempted murder , after his wife separated from him and filing for a protection order against after he put a gun in her mouth and threatened to kill her.

So that’s why I feel bad for Ray Rice. He was caught on video. The video went viral. But domestic violence happens and is rarely caught on camera.  It’s usually behind closed doors. It doesn’t mean it’s not happening. It’s doesn’t mean there isn’t a problem in today’s society. Just because we don’t have pictures and videos of it that doesn’t mean it’s not even more horrid then a one punch knock out.  So I feel bad for the guy. What he did was wrong but for some reason he is this new poster person , but not for domestic violence itself but  the media and NFL and how to penalize its players.

My point is domestic violence is a real thing. I hate the gender-ism though. With ESPN and news channels not once have I heard about men victims. It’s a real thing. It’s out there. Men are victimized daily. It’s not a gender thing.  Plus, is it fair that women can get away with yelling, shoving, mushing and slapping of a guy and a guy is supposed to just sit there and take it? It’s not fair. Women need to learn how to act right just as much as men do.

And NOW , the national organization for women wants the NFL commissioner fired. Excuse me feminists… but the police let Ray Rice go. It’s not the league’s job to do policing. Other players when arrested the league effectively passed their penalty after the police has made their ruling. Aaron Hernandez was erased from NFL  when he was arrested, rightly so. The cops let Ray Rice go with anger management classes. The league thought that was the end. I don’t blame the league at all. It’s the judicial system that’s messed up. NOW should be going after the people who handled the case and why he was let off with a slap on the wrist.

But what truly annoys me about this whole situation. What about the real victims. I’m not saying that Janay  isn’t a victim. I’m saying how do we as a society help people daily and how to do we do something real to effect change in the future, to prevent others from becoming victims. To do something about the rampant violence in today’s society. Nothing is actually being done. All this publicity isn’t actually raising any kind of awareness or real questions or real problem solving ideas. It’s just media running wild with ratings.

Not once have I seen an 800 number on the screen. Not one announcer has spoken out “if you or you know someone or suspect someone of suffering domestic abuse please contact…” There has been no charity supported or announced. There has been no awareness announced on air. No message of where people can go to get help.

Domestic violence is a very real thing. But before you jump on a bandwagon make sure you know the whole story.

We have a humanity problem in today’s world. People lack common sense and decency. Empathy and compassion are being replaced by greed and violence.

I just ask everyone remember the real problem. Treat others how you want to be treated. Never hide behind preconceived social norms. Man or woman it’s about acting like a decent human being.

  1. Nice post:
    Well researched and written


    • Thanks Stafford! It was more a rant. It is football season and Omar leaves the TV permanently on espn and this is all they are talking about. If there was actual awareness or help coming out of this I wouldn’t mind but there is just nothing of substance coming out of this.

      Liked by 1 person

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